2012 Fantasy Draft Diary

We’re coming to you live from the St. Joe’s Church basement in Moorhead, Minnesota for the 5th annual Shanley Alumni Draft! Even though it's not on most people's calendar, this is still one of the great days of the year for me. Hang out with 11 (mostly) cool guys and make fun of everyone there for any reason possible. The league, for the third straight year, is still comprised of me, Kevin (the commissioner), Ben, Jerry, short Dan, taller Dan, Paul, Miko, Bob, the still kinda new guy Josh, Greg, and Krosby. Though it's technically the 5th league draft in its history, this league dates back almost a decade to our high school years, when an intrepid high school freshman had the audacity to make fun of his English teacher for owning Wayne Chrebet. Let the draft diary begin! But first, some pre-draft notes:

We decided our draft order by drawing NFL rookie’s names out of a hat and using the order they were drafted in to decide our own draft order. I drew Chandler Jones, so I’m stuck picking 12th in the draft this year. At least we find out in April. I spent months honing and fine-tuning my strategy for the 12th pick and I’ve narrowed it down to two distinct styles I prefer. Plan A right now is a leaf right out of the Matthew Berry 2012 Draft Day Manifesto: go QB-TE early. The prevailing theory behind this is that you win leagues in weekly increments and QBs score more than any other position and TEs are the 2nd-most consistent position. The NFL is a passing league- it’s wisest to follow the lead and keep up with the trend. Benchmarks like 4,000 yards aren’t as impressive as it once was. You need a stud to keep up with other studs.

This one will be contingent on me getting Matthew Stafford, my #4 QB, at the minimum. Cam Newton, the only player of any note on my team last year still interests me at 12.

Ideally, I’d love to get Brees, but that’s not likely. I’d use the next 7-8 rounds getting value at RB and WR. If Gates does slip to the 4th, I might take him to pair with Gronk. (The league has a WR/TE flex.) We’ll see how it goes.

Plan B is more traditional- grab the best two and safest runners early- preferably two of Matt Forte, DeMarco Murray, and Jamaal Charles. I’d have to wait on getting a QB

10:10 AM- Jerry, Dan J, Kevin and I are here an hour early and doing a hilarious “grab-bag” draft. First round is an association with that manager (we say said manager's name and the room calls out the first thing they think of), 2nd round is Top NFL players of 1998, 3rd round is dictators, 4th round is games, 5th is your favorite colleague. A great new idea is born. Can’t say I’ve ever argued over who was worse, Mao or Stalin. Other highlights include giving Krosby Mitt Romney in the first round, and Josh the name of his twin sister. Equally hilarious is when people start to trickle in as draft starting time approaches, only to look at the board in confusion when they see "Justinian" on there. 

11:06- We’re 6 minutes late. After a 20-minute discussion and presentation on the merits of the Empire League (as proposed by Paul Charchian of leaguesafe.com), I am starting to get pretty anxious. I just want to see who I can get. I'm basically tuning out all of the complicated arguing. I'm practicing my Matthew Stafford hand-writing for when I put it on the board.  

11:19- The league trophy ceremony begins…the draft is only a really boring speech away from starting.

11:20- Short Dan's speech is a train wreck, as he attempts to dedicate the draft to the white board we're using. I'm starting to get bad vibes from him in regards to how his draft ought to go...

11:22- The draft is finally on. First pick: a surprising choice as Ray Rice goes. The next owner, Miko can’t believe it- he was apparently totally set on Ray Rice at 2nd overally. He sits in a daze looking over his rankings wondering who he should take. I’m betting it’s Foster.

11:23- Eventually he recovers and takes Aaron Rodgers.

11:28- The first “what the hell?!?!” moment of the draft occurs as Drew Brees is gone at pick #5 (after Tom Brady at #4). If our draft was like the NFL Draft and we had a green room to invite the top five players, LeSean McCoy would have a Brady Quinn/Aaron Rodgers look on his face as he wonders how he went from pre-draft lock to be gone in the top 4 to outside the top 5. The commissioner chimes in, “Just goes to show, you think you know how the draft will go and it never, ever does.”

11:33- Normalcy is slowly returning, as Calvin Johnson goes at #7, followed by Stafford, Chris Johnson, Darren McFadden and Andre Johnson. Damn. I was really hoping Stafford would fall to me at the end of the round so I could pair him with Gronkowski. I’ve got to figure out whether I should take Cam or just take the RB-RB approach and take Forte and Murray.

11:37- Screw it, I’m going to gamble and worry about running back later. Cam Newton, back for Round 2! There’s no way he’ll get 14 rushing TD’s, but there’s no way he’ll average the measly 217 he did in the 2nd half of 2011, either. I’d sacrifice a few rushing TDs for more passing yards and TDs. Ben remarks, “right out of the Matthew Berry manifesto.” Glad to see the rest of the league is keeping up with the Joneses, even if most of us are more secretive than Bill Belichick’s injury reports.  

11:38- The first round has concluded and the results are staggering- 5 QBs went in round one. Kevin is incredulous. After thinking hard about Forte, Murray, and Charles, I decided I want an elite QB. As I’ve said before, Cam is the NFL’s Michael Jordan.

11:43- The reigning champ makes the first questionable pick, grabbing Maurice Jones-Drew. I guess he’s not planning on defending his crown all that closely.

11:51- Round 2 has gone basically according to schedule. After Gronk went to lead off the round, it didn’t take long for a WR run to start, followed by a burst of RBs thrown in. Jimmy Graham goes 3 picks after Gronk.

11:59- Another strange pick- Peyton Manning goes at pick #3 in round 3. I was totally expecting almost everyone else to wait on QBs after the binge in round one. I guess someone believes in Peyton. Kevin lobs a barb at Greg, the resident Broncos fan in the league about missing out on his boy.

12:02- Kevin takes one of the guys I had on my must-have list as he grabs Jordy Nelson. The way I see things developing in Green Bay’s receiving corps is for Nelson to continue to get more and more targets. This is starting to look a lot like the mid-90’s Antonio Freeman-Robert Brooks duo the Packers had. Nelson will supplant Jennings, just as Freeman did. I’m calling it right here, right now.

12:04- Ben follows Kevin by taking Wes Welker, proclaiming his strategy is to take “safe, boring, and consistent players.” About half of the other owners reply with some variation of “your drafts are always boring- what’s new?” Gotta love the smack talk.

12:07- I take a long look at the guys who figure to be available. Stunningly, consensus Top 10 running back Ryan Mathews is still on board. I hate him as a player, but he’s still pretty solid in fantasy and this kind of player wouldn’t have been available normally at the end of round three. He might slip. The late-2nd round run on running backs has paved the way for more people to take WRs. If this continues, I might just be able to snag a Mathews-New York Giants WR combo at the turn.

12:10- Dammit! Victor Cruz and Hakeem Nicks go back-to-back right after Trent Richardson, the other back I was hoping for at the end of the round go. I can just see Greg taking Mathews. Which would suck. I’d be stuck with Michael Turner or Ahmad Bradshaw as my top RB. Not a pleasant thought. Turner is getting up there and Bradshaw is made of saran wrap. No and no. Not here, anyway.

12:15- Mathews manages to fall to me. I already knew I was going to take him if he fell, but the last two rounds weeded out most of the WRs I wanted here. I’m stuck looking at Dwayne Bowe, who just showed up to Chiefs camp after holding out briefly or Mike Wallace, who just showed up to Steelers camp after holding out briefly. It’s practically even for me. I like Kansas City more than Pittsburgh. Bowe it is.

12:27- Nothing terribly exciting happens for the next 24 picks. Each guy goes in a part of the draft that suits him and makes sense. It’s a testament to how strong our owners are when it comes to preparation.

12:32- I’m thinking RB with my next pick. Most of the guys I wanted next are going to be gone as I sit and wait. Though I don’t love him, BenJarvus Green-Ellis looks to be the safest of the bunch.

12:34- BJGE fell to me, so I now have at least one RB I can count on getting the rock and showing up each week. What to do with my 2nd sandwich pick, though? I’d like to get another WR to complement Bowe, but the ones here after Torrey Smith don’t catch my eye. I suppose I could take a Reggie Wayne or Pierre Garcon. They’ll both be heavily target by talented rookies, and as Newton showed last year, even rookies can lead to a career renaissance for vets with gas in the tank. I’m tempted to go TE here. Our league has a WR/TE flex, which means I can play Gronkowski as a WR (where he’s still elite, even though he’s a TE), and grab a guy like Vernon Davis or Jermichael Finley. I trust Finley more- better QB, safer play, and a stronger supporting cast around him.

12:37- It just hits me, as Eli Manning and Jay Cutler both get taken that Tony Romo and Mike Vick are still around. Though they have their critics, they’re still really good fantasy QB’s. I bet they’ll be gone by the end of the round.

12:42- Three picks later, Mike Vick is gone. Jerry, who I’m sitting by had commented on how great the QB values are here and his disbelief that Vick is around. After taking Vick he pumps his fist, which earns a disappointed f-bomb from Josh. I figured Josh would’ve been glad to be shot of Vick after taking him at #1 overall last year, but I guess he’s still a fan. Now for the Tony Romo/Philip Rivers watch to begin.

12:54- Most of the rosters, with the exception of the reigning champ, look pretty good. The champ followed up his dubious MJD pick by taking Miles Austin, otherwise known as Ben’s man-crush from 2010. Austin of course has a history of hamstring issues and what do ya know? He’s got another hammy injury this preseason. At this rate, Tony Romo and Blaine Gabbert are starting to look similar, a bad sign for Tony. Both guys fail in the clutch more often than not and feature horrible offensive lines to go with banged-up WRs. I’m skeptical that the league is really that down on Romo. He’s still the QB of a good offense and his receivers should get healthy.

1:03- We reach the end of the 6th round and Romo isn’t gone yet. Kevin continues to piss me off by taking guys I wanted (this time Stevan Ridley) and Miko joins in by taking Pierre Garcon. After my trade with the commish last year, I’m starting to wonder if he’s reading my mind and just taking guys I like on purpose or he’s really that clever. I’m guessing a little of both. Miko just got lucky.

1:03- Dan takes Matt Ryan, a pick I hate. Someone please explain how having two elite WRs and an old TE makes him suddenly better than Romo or Rivers, both of whom are still around. Even if Julio Jones and Roddy White combine for 3,000 yards and 28 touchdowns, that still leaves the rest of Atlanta’s average offense to tack on the remaining 1,500 yards and 10 TDs it will take for Ryan to join the elite at the position in fantasy.

1:04- Dan follows Ryan up with Reggie Wayne. Three of the last six picks have been guys I had my eyes and heart set on. That’s the only problem with such a competitive league. You’ll get screwed a few times.

1:14- We get to Josh, who asks if Matt Schaub is still available. I nearly fall out of my chair. Does everyone realize that Romo and Rivers are available? What the hell’s going on here? Did someone prank the rest of the league by cutting Romo’s name out of all of their rankings?

1:21- Jerry finally ends the madness by taking Romo to back up Vick. Back-to-back QB is an unorthodox strategy, but I love the pick. Romo is still good and he’s great insurance for Vick, who, to no one’s surprise, is already hurt. I’m debating skipping on a dime-a-dozen RB and taking Rivers with my next pick to supplement Cam in case he struggles. If he doesn’t, I’ll still have great trade bait. It’s win-win for me.

1:24- Paul pulls a Kevin and takes Ben Tate, who I surely would have taken along with Rivers here. Bob, the Arian Foster owner, looks a little disappointed. That’s what you get for taking Robert Meachem instead of the best backup RB in fantasy.

1:25- I take Rivers. Like I said above, it’s win-win for me. He’s too strong a value to justify not taking him in favor of some bargain bin RB like Kevin Smith.

1:25- Time for our mid-draft break. Time to get up, walk around a bit and make some backhanded compliments on who other owners drafted or just make fun of Miko’s Dolphins for taking Ryan Tannehill.

1:30- The draft resumes. During the break I had a major internal argument. I desperately need another RB to tide me over until Mathews can return from his injury. I’m thinking Cedric Benson, who looked good for the Packers in limited duty, Rashad Jennings, who takes over until MJD’s holdout ends, or Mark Ingram.

1:45- Picks are rolling along. Guys have ideas of what they have needs at and are building their rosters accordingly. Nothing eventful happens until Ben f-bombs Miko for taking Titus Young with the 2nd pick of round 9. I’m reminded of a classic, if brief SHS Alumni League story.

A few years ago, before the 2007 season started, I had decided that I was going to try to draft Tony Romo for my team that year. He wasn’t as highly rated then as he would later be, so I figured he would be a great value in the 7th or 8th round, more or less. The league wasn’t nearly as competitive then, as we still had a couple of doormats in the league. One guy in particular made a habit of finishing in the basement and making weird draft picks. Anyway, that year, I was fully expecting Tony Romo to be there in round 8, but our league ne’er-do-well took Romo in the 3rd round, prompting a slew of expletives from me, which in turn drew out a number of laughs at both the absurdity of the pick and my reaction to it. To this day, fellow owners still like to bring this up.

1:50- Ben returns the favor to me, taking preseason darling David Wilson. I had my eyes set on Wilson, being well-acquainted with his talents after watching his career at Virginia Tech. Josh takes a leaf out of his book, grabbing Denarius Moore, a big-time athletic talent who showed flashes of dominance as a rookie in 2011. This is starting to piss me off- I’ve been hosed at least four times in the draft.

Unusually, Jerry hasn’t screwed me once. This is in direct opposition to last year, when he got me at least four times. I don’t really remember the exact number. I’m trying to forget my 2011 season. (Thanks a lot, Jamaal Charles.)

1:51- Despite my whining, I do like my team- Cam and Gronk, along with Mathews, Green-Ellis, Benson, plus Bowe, Finley, and Rivers. Not too shabby.

2:15- The War Room has gotten uncharacteristically quiet. Either the sugar rush from all the donuts and orange juice has worn off, or these guys are actually thinking about their picks. One can never be too sure with Krosby, who has somehow managed to make a handful of boneheaded picks (as opposed to the usual half-dozen).

2:28- Scratch what I said about Krosby. He just took Montario Hardesty. I don’t care that he has Richardson. Bad, bad, bad pick. Hardesty is a horrible fit for the Browns’ West Coast offense.

3:15- With the draft and me being the only one with a functional computer, it’s time for me to plug our rosters into a program that will digest the numbers and tell us who the best team should be. Though the projections are from early June, it still doesn’t excuse the fact that it spits out the defending champ for the 2nd straight year. I hate fantasy football sometimes. After his annoying trophy acceptance speech from earlier, his equally annoying celebration of the computer’s analysis has me counting down the days until our first fantasy matchup.

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